Trainer: Teach middle class rules to get out of poverty

Schools and businesses use hidden middle class rules, and to pull people out of generational poverty, they must be taught those rules, a teacher trainer said Friday.
Barbara Miller, director of training and development for Community Action Southwest, spoke to Washington School District teachers about “Bridges out of Poverty.” She has spoken around the state and at conferences about the issue, but said this is the first school district in Washington County where she’s presented the information.
“We have to understand the hidden rules and then we have to teach them the (middle class) rules without telling them their rules are wrong,” she said. “You should expect nothing less from them than anyone else, but understand they have barriers.”
Middle class children grow up knowing those rules because they are taught them, she said. However, parents who are in generational poverty don’t know those rules to teach them to their children, she said.
For example, she said people in poverty use language more casually while the middle class uses correct grammar.
A 5-year-old in poverty is exposed to 10 million words, while a 5-year-old in a middle class home is exposed to 20 million words and a wealthy 5-year-old, 30 million, she said.
Education is abstract for those who live in poverty, while it is viewed as a necessity for the middle class. Those in poverty may not graduate from high school, much less consider additional training or education, she said.
The opposite is true for the middle class, who think, “Of course, my children are going to go to school,” Miller said.
She said people in poverty think of money to be spent; the middle class plans how to use their money, and the wealthy invest their money to make money, she said.
“I’m all about planning, but I learned that,” Miller said. “It’s hard to think that way when you are pouring coins into a Coinstar to buy bread. You’re not thinking about buying a home when you are homeless. You’re not thinking about how pretty the food is when you are starving. You’re not thinking about going to college when no one is helping you get through the third grade.”
When she was growing up in her upper middle class home, Miller said she had dinner after school, helped her mother clean the kitchen, did her homework and her parents checked it.
“Do you think that’s what kids in poverty go home to?” she questioned, saying that some don’t know if they will go home to dinner or have parents home when they get there.
If children are raised in a family that’s been in poverty for generations, that’s all they know, she said. There are hidden rules for poverty, just as there are for the middle class and wealthy, she said.
“They are born into it,” she said. “They love their parents just like your kids love you. They think what their parents are doing is right.”
It doesn’t happen because those parents are bad, Miller said.
“It’s because their parents are living the lives they were living when they were kids,” she said. “So we’re trying to teach them something new.”
Teachers and schools play a significant role in helping students learn ways to pull themselves out of poverty, she said.
It’s complicated because kids in poverty don’t have the same resources. They may not have a computer or transportation to the library to work on a report after school, she said.
Resources are not just financial, though that is part of the picture, she said. It’s also about having emotional support, mental resources, spiritual resources, physical resources, support systems, relationships and role models.
“We can’t blame kids for being born into poverty. It’s not their fault,” she said. “This ‘Bridges out of Poverty’ is to help get out of poverty. We need your help and encouragement.”